You know how when you know you have a dentist appointment coming, you make sure you brush your teeth really well for that last week floss every day (after six months of flossless life)? Then that morning, you make sure you blow you nose really well so you don’t have any danglers or spider webs. Well, not only do I floss every day for that last week, brush super great, and check for danglers and webs, but I make sure I’m super cute.
I don’t even go this far for a date (but then again, a date isn’t scrutinizing my dental work underneath a crazy big halogen light with a water pick and tiny mirror). I want to make sure my eye makeup is just right because he’s only three inches away from my face and I want to make sure his view through those huge plastic dentist goggles is nice. I put on perfume because I’m sure he’s tired of smelling halitosis and mint toothpaste. I ponder pithy remarks for those rare moments of relief when he’s not stretching my mouth to epic proportions in order to become familiar with my uvula. And I wear clothes that will match the blue paper bib because heaven forbid my clashing in front of the dental Adonis perched above me in his dashing gun-metal blue scrubs and messed hair with a bit of gray at the temples. Sigh.
So, he’s married. Maybe he has a brother. If he does, he’ll for sure recommend me to him. I mean, I didn’t have any cavities!
5 comments:
Casey...you sure do have a way with words! Man...I need to look for a new dentist!
I'm so excited for this blog!!
I was laughing so hard, but trying not to because I'm in a very quiet office. You really bring a whole new light to the dentist office.
LOL! My dentist is hot too! and i do the same thing!! (except maybe match with the blue bib but i might start that now!)
That was nice! At least you have the motivation to go to the dentist. Nothing motivates a person more than the prospect of seeing the object of her affection! hehehe.
This is really innovative! How interesting! For a good dentist.
Dentist
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