Slacker

What a slacker. . . Slack slack slackin’ through life. It’s not that I haven’t had anything happen to me since the last post. I have- a lot actually. Since January, I’ve had my hair done a few times, written and storyboarded a few things, designed and built a set for a play, bought too many clothes, even more shoes, developed a fondness for certain types of sushi, dressed up as Julie McCoy, played a game show host, performed on stage a few times, was filmed by a camera crew while wearing an ugly outfit, kept my dog alive, drooled in California, went to Disneyland yet again, hit the beach, wished to hit the beach more, watched a guy in a mullet and Star Trek uniform walking around the movie theater three weeks after the movie opened, suffered through the crap Monsters vs. Aliens movie and swore to burn down Dreamworks, bought more reusable “green” grocery bags, blew bubbles at the drive-in, moved offices, bought a kooky lamp, sang several duets in the office with the only other person who knows show tunes in a video game company, got hit on by a truck full of eighteen year olds who subsequently got pulled over by the cops, rode dirty on Big Thunder Mountain Railroad, drank a mint julep, got a crush on a Wal-Mart employee (I’m finding the most random excuses to go there. . . Weird!), drank my weight in Diet Coke, became a Maid of Honor, got the emissions done on my car, planned a few trips for the future and committed to start a most serious diet tomorrow for said trips.

Now that may seem impressive but there are still so many things I haven’t done since January (some are things I’ve NEVER done!). I haven’t learned Greek, been to Europe and subsequently enjoyed the various and sundry entertainments or food or men to be enjoyed while in Europe, learned the haka, cooked something gourmet, sang opera (unless you count jibberish opera onstage), met my new Hollywood crush (Mr. Spock on the new Star Trek is as tasty as an alien can get - and I’ve seen many aliens in my day. ET had a face only a mother could love and Chewie? Well, I’ll just leave it at that), jumped on a trampoline, swam 4 laps in any type pool, been on an elliptical machine, talked like Doris Day, watched a film starring Parker Posey, bought anything made of actual gold, tripped in front of a crowd of 50 or more, been to a book signing, eaten hot Chee-tos, sewn a potholder, tiptoed through tulips, or been vaccinated.

So obviously I’m not as accomplished as I may appear. In fact, I’ve got tons to do. Why the heck am I wasting time here?!